Women Are Crazy, and Men Are Lunatics Too.

Fratitude is on the money when he claims that all girls are crazy. It's true. We are. We're out of our effing minds. And the truth of the matter is, any girl who ever refutes the fact that she's crazy (at least in a relationship) is probably the craziest of the batch. But now that I've agreed and caved, and grabbed up my gold "crazy" medal, I've got to grill the guys, because my theory? Is that ya'll a bunch of crazies, too.

As is the case with all women, there are different degrees of crazy men. I'm going to break it down into sub-crazy categories, and you tell me if you can't spot yourself in one of them. If you can't, you may want to phone-a-friend (you know, just to double check that that ain't you).

{Mild}

A guy does a double take when you and your girl walk by. He's definitely checking her out. You don't say anything. You never say anything, as a matter of fact, but it really bothers you. You've taken it out on her, once or twice. You know, the fact that her shorts are a little too short, or her boobs aren't completely covered.

The Verdict: Cool your jets, bro. It's not her fault that guys check her out, and you're not the Fashion Police, either. It's a good thing you don't look to open your mouth and rip those guys a new one, because if your girl isn't macking it with them, it shouldn't matter that they're picturing her sweet ass underneath her clothes. Relax. All it means is that your girl is hot. If you are so uncomfortable with the girl you're rolling around with looking like a fifty-cent hooker, you may want to reevaluate your standards in women or your own insecurities.

{Medium}

It's Wednesday, and it's Girls Night. No boyfriends. You know this. But this big dude (who your girl claims is just a friend) has been spitting game all week at the gym, and he's gonna be out at the bar tonight with your girl, her friends and his. That's not cool. You rally up the troops and parade your boys around the bar like you're doing your own thing. Bullshit. They're actually posted up at every corner of the bar, swigging their beers and keeping an eye out on your girl. You're not throwing down, but no one's gonna play you like that.

The Verdict: The sad truth is that more guys than would actually like to admit pull this little game. I get it. You're territorial. So am I. But there's a fine line between caring and just plain creeping. And you know what? We know what you're doing. You look like Gargoyles hanging up at the top of the bar. If anything, your little gang parade makes us wanna get freaky, just to piss you off more, and you're not gonna like it. Standing post at the bar is overbearing, suffocating and just downright psycho. Stay home, pop in the PS3 and open a brew, and we'll drunk dial you later. Kiss kiss.

{Spicy: Off the Walls, Apeshit, Nuts, Crazy}

You slept over your girl's place and she went out to grab the two of you some breakfast. Sweet, right? You take that time to scroll through her cell phone (lucky for you, she left it home) and happen upon a few text messages that don't sit right with you. You take down those numbers (as collateral, you're not going to pull that girl-bullshit texting them about their relations), and scream bloody murder on her. You're Sherlock Holmes all of a sudden, and none of her alibis are good enough. She breaks up with you (let's face it dude, that was scary) and you send her Facebook and text messages, apologizing for the mess you've made. You just love her and don't want to lose her. Your buddy reminds you that you effed up big. You had the coolest girlfriend around, and flipped over a few friendly text messages.

The Verdict: It's time to reevaluate your life, my friend. Sometimes, we tend to get caught up (remember, I know this well) in our significant other's life. We want to be there for them for the good, the bad and the ugly, to the point where sometimes we start caring too much, and just don't know how to show it. If this sounds like you, I'm here to remind you: You just don't know how to show it.